Broken Sleep

Last night was a little rough. I got a terrible nights sleep. For some reason after I took my pills my heart started racing. I'm not sure why but it took me a couple of hours to settle down and finally fall asleep. The dream I had was extremely vivid. I was cussing out a friend of mine at a car dealership. He was trying to explain every reason to the salesmen why they shouldn't sell the car to me and I got in a fight with him about how my life is compared to him. After about an hour or so of dreaming I woke up and used the bathroom and couldn't fall back to sleep until around 7am. I slept on and off until about noon today.

I find with the medication I have extremely vivid dreams. It can make it difficult to snap out of them and return back to normal life when I wake up. With that said, I also understand the importance of sleep on a daily basis. I should be getting between 7 and 9 hours every day of uninterrupted sleep. I find that my finally thoughts before bed usually have no impact on what I'm dreaming about... but my final thoughts before bed will determine if I pass right out or if I end up taking a while. Last night I was thinking about what if something happened to my girlfriend. That if someone wanted to hurt me they would use her in order to do it. It wasn't very pleasant and damn near caused my fight or flight to kick in which I think is why it took so long for me to fall asleep in the first place.

I'm not sure how I am going to be today. Something tells me today is going to be an off day. But it's early enough that I think I can turn it around if I want to.

That's all for now,

-T.A. Michaels

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A couple of weeks to reset.

Recently, I got a new job. When i went to put in my two weeks at my existing job management indicated that I didn't have to come in and could be discharged early if i wanted. So i said ok. I've had about 2 weeks off by this point and I start my new job on Monday the 28th. I'm looking forward to it.  While I've been off, I've been tending to things around the house and becoming more active. I've been able to go to the gym virtually any time i want... and the wife and I even took up Basketball today. I'm hoping that i can spend this fall / winter / spring getting my physical health in order while at the same time advancing my career. I am also working on Quitting smoking. Today is day 3 of 56 in the program. I'm expecting my sense of smell to improve sometime in the next 24 hours. Usually it kicks in between day 3 and day 5. It usually comes on suddenly and without warning. All of a sudden the smells of the room I'm in are overly amplified. Which can h...
Read more

Why I'm no longer on Chantix

 While the medication can be good for some, I noticed a stark difference in my thought patterns after the 5 day mark. I had actually gone as long as nine days on the medication but i found that day 8 did not start with a resolving throwing the pack away and moving on into the future with resolve and courage. In fact, it was quite the opposite. By the end of day 8 I had resolved pretty negatively that I was better off dead. The negative attitude i was developing was interfering with my job, and my marriage. I would honestly advise anyone who has Schizoaffective disorder, Bi-Polar type, to stay clear of Chantix as a smoking cessation medication. About three days after coming off the medication i did notice a shift in thinking in a new direction though. I wouldn't say that it reset my thought patterns, but it actually gave me a new hopes and ideas.  I correlated that my good morning habits in years past wasn't due to not being on the medication or working third shift.... It was a...
Read more

The last few days of August.

 This year had basically been chaotic for me. Between Me losing and getting a new job to Katie going out on TDI and quitting her job. The only thing that really stayed constant was the apartment. Nothing wrong with that I suppose.   In Recent developments... I got my teeth and eyes checked out for the first time in about 10 years. I didn't have any cavities (Which pissed off Katie). But I did require a root and scaling procedure. As for My vision.. I could have probably spent 10 dollars on readers rather than going with the prescription... But I at least know why my eyes are as bad as they are. Apparently when I was a kid... I was suppose to wear an eye patch to correct a lazy eye. But it never happened because the doctors back then thought that I needed glasses which I never really ended up wearing. Well... hear I am 30 years later and I need glasses. I'm not bitching about it... I'm just making a general observation. I recently heard about age spurts.. basically at 2 dist...
Read more